Music is my home forever

Originally Written: Feb, 2021

It can be said that the beginning of life was just a series of mistakes; these perfect little occurrences that led to something bigger just by chance. Or it could be said that there was so much potential for life, that it had to happen eventually. "Something" got it wrong enough times that it finally got it right once. And once it happened, it just kept happening, but with a little more experience each time. The secret was that each time something new was created, a little piece of the creator had to be put into the creation, in order for the creation to live.

And so life began and brought forth more life, because there was something so inherently beautiful in creating. In the blink of an eye, billions of years had come and gone, and life forgot about the first beginning. Nonetheless it created more and more. It eventually forgot the secret. The secret that it had come from nothing but potential, intention and will. It had long forgotten the original creator. The creator had forgotten itself in its own creation.

Fast forward another billion years:

I was born not knowing about the beginning, or the creator. I was born not knowing that countless civilizations had come and gone before me. I was born not knowing that countless brilliant minds and beautiful worlds and ideas, all floating in the mystic somewhere, had once gone through everything I was just about to go through in my short time here as a human being. The same old story, just told through different eyes and new circumstances.

I didn't know anything about Bolivia, or that there was any other place in the world other than where I was. I didn't know that my biological father had committed suicide before I was born, or that my eighteen-year-old mother had gone to the United States to better our lives, leaving me in the care of my grandparents. I just knew that my grandparents and my uncle were my life and that the valley of Cochabamba, surrounded by giant green mountains, was my home. I knew that my grandmother had the singing voice of an angel, and my grandfather made magic fly from his guitar.

I remember sitting on my grandfather's lap as he strummed some chords. I must have been no older than three. I sat there wondering how his fingers could make the notes come out, because every time I tried, I would just keep the sound from coming out. So I would just hit the open strings one by one because those were the only sounds I could make the thing do. I could still smell the earthy dust from the inside of his old Yamaha classical guitar, and hear the echoes of my grandmother's songs down the hallway of that old stone house on America Avenue. I knew even back then, that I could find home in music.

Fast forward to the present:

I'm living in the USA. (Manasquan NJ to be exact)… I've been playing guitar for 2 decades now, played hundreds of shows, became a music producer and have had my first song chart in the top 20 on iTunes. My songs have been streamed two million times....

Yet Im looking through the window at the farm across the street, and my old pup, Chet, is nudging at my elbow for some treats. We are listening to some jazz tracks for inspiration and dreaming of summer festivals once COVID is under control. It’s a clear and bitterly cold morning outside, but I’m making some tomato soup for lunch and it’s nice and toasty in my apartment. I’m looking forward to my girlfriend getting home. I can certainly say that life is not so bad. In fact, I’d say that these little things are more of a blessing to me than anything else!!! 

My grandparents are long gone now; both on their new journey into the afterlife. My mother now lives in NYC in a beautiful apartment by central park. My father, the man who stepped in one day and took me in with love as his own, is at work, my little sister is down the road working on her own dreams. This is the music of my life now, and I can't help but think about forever and the first creator.

All the victories, failures, mistakes and successes have brought me here to this moment in time, and I realized that I don’t have to worry much about the future, because since birth, all I've ever known was the present moment.... You might ask... what of the first creator? Well, I've come to understand through faith that they have been here the whole time, inside of us and everything else that we see and don’t see; not as some omnipotent force on the outside that we should fear or grovel to. The first creator is love. Love is what made us who we are. Love is why I make music, and why music is my home. 


So what is forever then?


To me, forever is the moment! We experience forever every single day. Forever comes from love. It is the will to live and create, just like it was back in the first beginning, (whenever that was). So you see, we already live forever. Even if it doesn't seem like it. 


Ok well anyway, its time for me to eat some tomato soup and play with my pup. lol  

Oh If you'd like to help me out on my journey and you haven't joined my community yet, please show your support by following me on instagram HERE . Thank you so much! 


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